Thinking?

Sorry it's been so long. It's just so much easier to facebook. Here is an update about what's been going on.

1- I've been working two jobs for about two months now. It's been so crazy! I love my new job, but they didn't have enough hours for me so I kept my old job too. Hopefully that will be changing soon so I can go back to having just one job. I haven't ever had a job where I looked forward to going to work this much and felt sad that my shift was over and I had to go home. It's weirding me out a little bit actually. Part of it is that the person I work with is just awesome. She keeps me laughing all the time. Love her!

2- Today we had our first John and Dawn Mills family reunion. It was SO much fun. My immediate family showed up early and we went on a five mile bike ride. It was such a fun thing for all of us to do together. I really enjoyed it. Mom has a odometer on her bike and she has gone over 300 miles on her bike this year. That is just amazing to me. Very cool!

3-At the family reunion I was drawn to the little kids, like I haven't really felt before. I was thinking about why that was today, and I've realized I think I'm ready to have kids. It's hard for me to explain, I'll try. Before my reasons to have kids have been weak i.e. -because I'm getting older, -because everyone else like Mom and Sam are getting older. But now it's almost a yearning to share the love and nurturing I feel. That sounds lame and doesn't explain it very well, but it's the best I could do.

4-I'm really scared about wanting to have kids. I have a few questions and would like to hear from you mothers out there.

--What made you want to have kids
--When did you know you were ready to have kids
--If you didn't think you were ready how did you prepare
--What happens when one person in the relationship is ready for kids and the other isn't? How do you prepare that other person?
--What is the best thing
--What is the hardest thing
--How did it affect you and your husbands relationship
--How much do you spend on diapers/formula and such
--One of my hesitations is that babies grow up to be people. People who talk back and make choices that you can't control. What makes it worth it then?

Those are just a few of the questions that run through my head


That's enough for now.